I dodge around on edge
as if expecting to find you in
a tiny corner or crevice
hidden in the dark
You know, that secret part of you
in the shadows or as a ghost,
the part we don't show?
Lost in a maze, searching through faces,
bumping into others starry-eyed, lost, fixated
Each footstep hypnotizes me into
the rhythm of a heartbeat, I turn my head
to see if you are there, disappointed
I desire for you to appear
But what if that desire is selfish?
If I wished enough would it happen?
What would happen if it did?
I dream a little glimmer of the truth
My mind's eyes sometimes even
forgets what you look like
Am I searching for a feeling or a face?
Maybe the desire is right
within me:
Comfort, kindness, peace,
motivation, inspiration,
excitement, acceptance, warmth,
trust, beauty, adventure, wisdom?
Am I capable of the strength I found within you?
Am I worthy of these feelings alone?
Am I even searching or just stumbling?
Living vicariously
through what I found in you
I am left drained of perspective
I feel nutty, nervous, empty
yet thrilled by an essence
My life is forever changed
Peace is not exclusive
The light I found in you comes from
the same sun I bask in,
the same sun I was born to witness,
the same sun I hope to meet you under
when I uncover my self from the shadows first.
